by Urban Samurai on February 7, 2011

A person who becomes fatigued when unhappy is useless.


What is going to light that fire in your belly if your own unhappiness is not?

I sat next to a girl the other night at dinner who told me she was getting divorced. I know and like her husband…I like him a lot. And I simply asked her, ‘Why?’ She described in detail her thought process. At the end of the day, it summed up to the fact that she just wasn’t happy…enough. They tried therapy a few times. They tried talking to a priest. They tried everything. But the relationship just wasn’t going to get to a point that was ultimately satisfying for her. She saw no way.

I like her ex. So naturally, I wanted to blame her. Or be angry at her. But I really couldn’t. It actually made me like her more. Think about that. Here is a friend of mine who is being left by a girl, and I now like her more. The reason being that she is unhappy…she had been unhappy for a long time…and she was doing something about it.

I almost started quoting Hagakure, but she doesn’t know I’m the Urban Samurai. And I didn’t want to go into a conversation about me, when this was about her. So instead I quoted a poem. (for the record I think I know 2 poems, and I’m hoping to drop the other one in casual conversation some other time soon.)

This poem, if I’m remembering correctly is about the poet’s wife who was dying of a disease. It’s by Dylan Thomas and the meaning lies in these two lines, ‘Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.’

The words are famous for a reason. They have stayed with me, because they are so powerful.

If you are dying, that’s literally in disease or old age, or figuratively in failure or in misery…you have to fight. Do not just sit there and accept this death, or accept failure, or accept misery. Rage against it. Fight it to your last breath. Make it your singular priority to get better. To be better. Do anything you can to get yourself up and out.

A person who gets fatigued when unhappy is useless to himself or herself. That person is useless to everybody. And this isn’t meant to scold. ‘Fatigue’ is a real symptom, but oftentimes it’s psychosomatic. You are creating that feeling of exhaustion. Stop. Wake up. Grab a Red Bull if you need to. Just get the hell up and battle this thing.